In the age of personality tests, it’s easy to think a dozen or so multiple-choice responses can reveal everything about you. But the most insightful indicators of what you’re all about are in the little, unconscious things you do daily. The way you walk, the way you respond to emails, these are behaviors that are like a secret code, interpreting your confidence level, your values, and your drives. “Too many personality tests are superficial,” declares Christine B.L. Adams, MD, a psychiatrist with over 40 years of personality research. “To really know yourself or others, pay attention to behaviors they show the feelings and motivations beneath.” Let’s examine how your everyday behavior might be telling you more than you realize.
1. The Way You Walk
Your walk is not just the way you get around it’s a personality tell. Body-language expert Carol Kinsey Goman, PhD, indicates that an erect, firm gait with head held high expresses confidence and openness, like celebrities’ “power walk.” Slumping posture, with shoulders hunched forward and head lowered, can express vulnerability or deep thinking. A 2021 article in the Journal of Personality and Individual Differences found that gait can even imply traits like psychopathy, since some gaits broadcast vulnerability to perceptive eyes. A fast, purposeful gait usually signifies a goal-oriented personality, while a plodding gait signifies a relaxed, observant mind. Your gait is an unspoken story of your disposition and outlook on life.
2. Your Handshake
A handshake is momentary, yet revealing. Human behavior expert Patrick Wanis, PhD, explains a firm, brief shake with one up-and-down movement expresses confidence. A loose grip may represent insecurity or bashfulness. The two-hand shake may be seen as aggressive, and the palm-down grip is dominant. Wanis warns against wiping your hand right after it implies you’re germ-obsessed or find the other person “unclean.” A Journal of Personality and Social Psychology study linked firm handshakes to extroversion and positivity, while weaker ones often tied to shyness. For women, a strong handshake can signal intelligence and openness, making it a powerful first impression.
3. Your Email Etiquette
Your email habits are a digital mirror of your personality. Dr. Adams says your emailing style is reflective of your real personality. Research has shown narcissists use “I,” “me,” and “mine” repeatedly, while extroverts tend to write in a casual manner, mentioning music or parties. Faultless emails suggest conscientiousness, possibly perfectionism, while persistent errors can be a sign of sloppiness. Lengthy emails can suggest thoroughness but also neediness, and a bulging inbox can suggest lack of ability to deal with being overwhelmed. An empty inbox, on the other hand, screams control and organization. Your e-mails are a digital footprint of your personality.
4. Nervous Tics
Nervous tics, like nail-biting or hair-twirling, are a straight shot to your emotional life. Known as “body-focused repetitive behaviors,” they are a manifestation of stress or anxiety. The more stressed you get, the more these tics emerge, a vicious cycle where emotions fuel physical habits. Perfectionists often have tics like hair-pulling as a way of coping with boredom or frustration. These behaviors are not random they’re a self-soothing ritual for coping with distress. Getting to know your tics gives you a clue about how you manage stress and get around in your own head.
5. Punctuality
The way you think about time says a lot about you. Dr. Adams suggests that punctual people tend to be rule-following people who take people’s time seriously, showing agreeableness and conscientiousness. Chronic lateness may be a sign of an egocentric personality or, as Goman proposes, may be linked to ADHD. A 2006 Journal of Research in Personality study found that punctual individuals are more conscientious, early arrivals prefer neuroticism, and late arrivals are easy-going. Regardless of whether you’re always early or always running late, your punctuality reflects the things that matter most to you and how you deal with the demands of life.
6. Your Eating Habits
“You are what you eat,” but, as Goman puts it, “you are also how you eat.” Slow eaters value control, savoring each bite, while fast eaters are maybe ambitious and impatient. Food seekers of novelty in taste would be thrill-seekers, while fussy eaters might crave predictability, perhaps with anxiety symptoms. Leaving space between foods on your plate? You’re likely detail-conscious. Saving the best bite for last suggests patience, while diving right in first indicates directness. Your way of eating is a tasty glimpse into your character.
7. The Clothes You Wear
Your closet speaks louder than your words. A 2020 study published in Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts found that flashy, designer clothing can signal insecurity or narcissism. But beware of jumping to conclusions self-expression or validation dressing. Comfort-based fashion suggests earthy nature, while polished outfits show you’re confident and love being in the spotlight. Your style bright or muted, high-end or thrift tells you and everyone else how you see yourself and want to be seen.
8. Your Shopping Habits
Your shopping patterns say a lot about you. According to a 2022 Journal of Retailing and Consumer Services study, frequent, impulsive shoppers were linked with hedonism and extroversion, driven by a need for stimulation. List makers who shop according to essentials are conscientious and agreeable, practical. Patrick Wanis mentions that spending tendencies, including overspending or hoarding money, can be signs of trust issues, including in relationships. Your shopping cart holds a lot of clues about your values and self-control.
9. How Often You Take Selfies
Selfies are more than just party fun on social media they’re a personality tell. A 2022 Journal of Open Psychology study found that frequent selfie-takers have lower self-esteem and crave validation online, but also show extroversion and an openness to valuing relationships. The trend is more popular with youth, where selfies embody sociability with vulnerability. Whether you take selfies daily or sporadically, the frequency reflects how much self-expression is in balance with the need to be affirmed.
10. Your Handwriting
Your handwriting is a personal signature of your mind. In 2018, research proved that computers could accurately predict personality types with 80% success using handwriting analysis. Large script that is heavy shows an extroverted, attention-grabbing personality, and small writing shows introversion and focus. Right slant = friendly, left slant = shy, no slant = logical. Firm pressure = intense feeling, light touch = adaptable. Every stroke is telling you a secret about who you are.
11. What You Drink
Your drink of choice water, coffee, or soda tells you more than taste. A 2021 Personality & Individual Differences study found that those who enjoy sweet drinks are spontaneous, living in the moment, while those who are health conscious are self-disciplined and planning-oriented. Your drink says how you approach gratification and planning.
12. If You Deflect Compliments
Brushing off compliments can come across as humility, but according to Dr. Adams, it can be a sign of low self-esteem or imposter syndrome. Brushing off compliments reinforces negative self-image, creating a cycle that hinders confidence. Self-acceptance and emotional resilience are shown through accepting compliments.
13. The Way You Argue
How you handle conflict reveals your underlying character. Defending disagreeing represents a closed character, while seeing disagreements as a chance to bond reflects confidence and openness. Your approach combative or collaborative is a reflection of emotional security and the desire to learn.
14. The Way You Treat Service Staff
How you treat cashiers or waiters is a raw measure of character. Kindness indicates empathy and respect, whereas rudeness can indicate arrogance. According to studies, empathetic exchanges value human dignity, indicating a kind, grounded person.
The Quiet Clues to You
Your personality isn’t in bold assertions or test results it’s in the small, subtle things of daily life. In your stride, your clothes, and those routines, these add up to a detailed portrait of your confidence, values, and motivations. By noticing these, you can observe yourself and others with greater accuracy, opening up the rich richness of human behavior.
