Let me get this straight: a guy walks into Buffalo Wild Wings, orders boneless wings, eats them, and then decides the most pressing injustice of 2023 is… that they’re made of chicken breast instead of actual wing meat. So he does what any reasonable person would do: he hires a lawyer, files a federal class-action lawsuit, and demands the world acknowledge that he has been personally victimized by a $12.99 appetizer.
That man is Aimen Halim, a Chicago resident who has turned “I feel slightly misled” into a full-time hobby. And just when you thought the boneless-wings saga couldn’t get any wilder, he’s back in court this time suing a blanket company for using too little water… or maybe too much? He’s honestly not sure. Buckle up this is the story of America’s most relentless professional plaintiff.
1. The Day Aimen Halim Discovered Boneless Wings Aren’t Wings
It all started on an ordinary January night in Mount Prospect, Illinois. Aimen Halim walked into Buffalo Wild Wings expecting, in his words, “chicken wings that have simply been deboned.” What he got instead were slices of chicken breast, breaded and fried to crispy perfection. To most of us, that’s still delicious. To Aimen, it was fraud. A culinary crime against humanity. He immediately lawyered up and filed a class-action lawsuit claiming Buffalo Wild Wings and its parent company had engaged in “false and deceptive marketing” because and I’m quoting the actual legal filing here the boneless wings were “more akin, in composition, to a chicken nugget.” The horror.
Why This Lawsuit Made the Entire Internet Face-Palm
- He genuinely believed “boneless wings” meant wing meat with the bone magically removed
- The menu literally says “all white meat chicken,” but reading comprehension is hard
- He paid a premium price for… chicken nuggets in sauce, apparently
- The complaint is 37 pages long longer than some college theses about fried chicken
- Somewhere, a real victim of actual fraud is waiting for this courtroom to free up
2. Buffalo Wild Wings’ Legendary Clapback That Deserves a Pulitzer
Most companies respond to lawsuits with a boring press release. Buffalo Wild Wings decided to go full savage. They dropped one single tweet that instantly became legend: “It’s true. Our boneless wings are all white meat chicken. Our hamburgers contain no ham. Our buffalo wings are 0% buffalo.” The internet lost its collective mind. Within hours the tweet had millions of likes, the legal team was crying laughing, and Aimen Halim probably ordered an extra side of ranch just to feel something.
Tweets That Should Be Framed in the Corporate Hall of Fame
- The ratio was so brutal it needed its own zip code
- They managed to mock the lawsuit without technically denying anything
- Zero lawyers were harmed in the making of this mic drop
- Even people who hate chain restaurants stood up and applauded
- This is the energy every customer-service team dreams of one day unleashing
3. From Wings to Blankets: Now He’s Mad About Water Usage
Just when the chicken dust settled, Aimen was back in federal court this time with a cozy new target. He and a handful of equally passionate plaintiffs sued Berkshire Blanket & Home Co. because their “EcoSoft” plush blanket claims to use “half the water” in manufacturing. Half the water compared to what? Excellent question. The lawsuit dedicates multiple pages to admitting they have no idea. But they’re still furious about it. The blanket retails for $20–$50 at Costco and Walmart, which means if the class gets certified, Aimen could be fighting for literally dozens of dollars.
The Most Confusing Environmental Lawsuit Ever Filed
- The claim literally says “half the water” and they’re mad it doesn’t explain the baseline
- They accuse the company of “greenwashing” while admitting they don’t know what was washed
- One of the exhibits is just a photo of a blanket looking suspiciously soft
- He bought the blanket, used it, and then decided it was morally wrong
- At this rate he’s going to sue his pillow for false advertising “extra fluffy”
4. Aimen’s Greatest Hits: The Lawsuit Resume That Keeps Growing
This isn’t his first rodeo. Or his second. Or even his third. Before boneless wings and eco-blankets, Food-law icon Bill Marler summed it up perfectly: “There’s a thin line between consumer advocacy and just being annoying.” Aimen moonwalks across that line daily.
Aimen Halim has sued:
- Tom’s of Maine for “Wicked Fresh” mouthwash that wasn’t wicked enough
- KIND bars for having a tiny bit of sugar (the horror)
- Hefty for recycling bags that maybe, possibly, weren’t 100% honest about recycling
His Ever-Expanding Portfolio of Petty Justice
- Every purchase comes with a side of litigation
- His grocery receipts double as legal evidence
- He probably has a frequent-filer punch card at the Northern District of Illinois
- At this point companies see his name on a complaint and just sigh
- Somewhere there’s a paralegal whose entire job is “research Aimen’s feelings”
5. The Bigger Trend: America’s Class-Action Lawsuit Boom
Aimen didn’t invent this game he’s just really, really good at it. Food and product-labeling class actions exploded from 18 in 2008 to over 300 in 2021. Vanilla extract that isn’t from a bean? Sue. “Hand-crafted” beer made in a factory? Sue. “Flushable” wipes that allegedly aren’t? Sue. Lawyers have figured out that if you file enough of these, companies will pay a few million just to make you go away. And guess who gets the biggest check? Not the consumers who bought a $9 box of granola the attorneys (and sometimes Aimen).
Why Your Grocery Store Is Suddenly Terrified of Words
- “Natural” now requires a 47-page disclaimer
- Companies are hiring linguists to write labels like legal documents
- The real winner is the guy who owns the copyright on the word “moist”
- Every marketing meeting now starts with “Will this make Aimen Halim angry?”
- We’re one lawsuit away from products labeled “Contains stuff, probably”
6. The Nebraska Man Who Tried to Out-Petty Aimen (and Failed)
Remember Ander Christensen from Lincoln, Nebraska? In 2020 he went viral for a nine-minute city-council speech begging the world to “remove the term boneless chicken wings from our menus and from our hearts.” He called them “nuggets lying about being wings” and got a standing ovation. For one brief, shining moment he was the people’s champion. Then Aimen Halim showed up with an actual federal lawsuit and stole his thunder forever.
Moments in Boneless-Wing History We’ll Never Forget
- Ander brought passion and tears
- Aimen brought lawyers and money
- Buffalo Wild Wings brought the single greatest tweet of all time
- The chicken industry just quietly raised prices again
- Somewhere a buffalo is laughing at all of us
7. So What Happens Next for America’s Most Hated Hero?
The boneless-wings case was temporarily dismissed on a technicality but is being refiled. The blanket case is still pending class certification. And Aimen Halim is, as of this writing, presumably walking the aisles of Target looking for his next emotional injury. Love him or hate him, he’s a walking reminder that in 2025 America, if you feel even slightly confused by a label, there’s a lawyer ready to turn your mild disappointment into a seven-figure settlement.
Whether that makes him a crusader or the human equivalent of the “slippery when wet” sign is up to you. Honestly? I’m just glad my hamburger has no ham and my buffalo wings are 0% buffalo. Thanks for the clarity, Aimen. Now please, for the love of ranch, go touch some grass.
